I am not a blogger

I am not a blogger. I am not a tweeter. I don't like writing, mostly because I have trouble bringing myself to get started, have too much else on my mind, or just end up demotivating myself because I read back what I just put down and it sounds ridiculous.

I am not a "business person". I am not a marketer. I am driven enough to work for myself, and (try to) start my own businesses, but the reality is, when it comes to essential business operations outside of tech, I don't know what the fuck I am doing.

I am a nerd. I am obsessed with technology, science, and society. I sit and read and absorb news, information, and media on the internet every single day on just about every subject. When I'm bored I can spend hours traveling through foreign lands in Google Earth.

I've been using computers since I learned to read the alphabet. In fact, I partially learned the alphabet using a game whose name I don't remember on that first computer.

But I am definitely not a crazy computer genius. I'm not one of those young self-taught programmers who created a best-selling video game when they were 12. I'm not the college kid that created the next social website and became a bazillionaire.

My goal in life is not to be that guy that "knows how to build a website". However whenever I'm between gigs, (or between partners, or awaiting payment from the last one... in general, unemployed), I start to feel that way again, which gets less and less valuable every single day. I could toss my coffee over my shoulder at any cafe in Williamsburg and hit 3 web developers hunting and pecking away on their pretty white macbooks.

One problem is, I don't remember to share all of the cool things I learn, and I've never felt that comfortable maintaining an "online persona", or marketing myself, or any of the things you need to do to move up in the ever-more-crowded web industry. A lot of people have become influential because they talk about the same things I do, they just do it online.

I just don't feel comfortable spouting my views on the internet, for some reason. That really has to change. So here we go.

14 years after my first self-taught HTML lesson, what am I going to do next?

I may not know yet, but I'm sure I have to start talking about it.